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jason
Got Rhythm
Joined: 02 Feb 2005
Posts: 50
Location: Brisbane
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 Posted: Fri Dec 16, 2005 1:38 am Post subject: Did you hear about the bass player who... |
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Q: What's the difference between a bass and a trampoline?
A: You take off your shoes to jump on the trampoline.
Q: Why don't bass players ever catch a cold?
A: Even a virus has some pride.
Q: How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Never mind. The piano player can do it with his left hand.
Q: What's the first thing a bass player says when he knocks on your door?
A: "Pizza!": |
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jason
Got Rhythm
Joined: 02 Feb 2005
Posts: 50
Location: Brisbane
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| Posted: Fri Dec 16, 2005 1:43 am Post subject: |
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| go on... flame away.... I used to play bass in a band for several years (and delivered pizza) so I know what I'm talking about... |
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1bassleft
Lowdown Cack-hander
Joined: 16 Feb 2005
Posts: 3674
Location: "Hit The North"
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| Posted: Fri Dec 16, 2005 1:48 am Post subject: |
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Jason,
Losing your job as a pizza deliverer is unfortunate. Losing your job as a bass player is a bit "special needs" 
1BL,
Still plucking |
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Michael
Lead Virtuoso
Joined: 02 Feb 2005
Posts: 1844
Location: Brisbane, Australia
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| Posted: Fri Dec 16, 2005 1:51 am Post subject: |
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1bassleft
Lowdown Cack-hander
Joined: 16 Feb 2005
Posts: 3674
Location: "Hit The North"
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| Posted: Fri Dec 16, 2005 2:15 am Post subject: |
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While we're on the jokes, here are a couple I like (apols if you've read them before):
Q: How many C+W bass players does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: IV, I, IV; I, IV...
A kid wants to learn bass so his dad block-books ten lessons with a teacher. After the 1st lesson, dad asks how it went. Kid replies "I'm jacking the lessons"
"Wha? Why?"
"A band's offered me a gig." |
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Tim
Low Frequency Out
Joined: 14 Aug 2005
Posts: 907
Location: At the back, behind the guitarist.
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| Posted: Mon Dec 19, 2005 8:58 pm Post subject: |
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I didn't understand the first one, no really 
But then I read the second one HAHAHAHAHAHA, I get it...he needed a lesson to get in a band, loser!!!! |
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1bassleft
Lowdown Cack-hander
Joined: 16 Feb 2005
Posts: 3674
Location: "Hit The North"
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| Posted: Tue Dec 20, 2005 2:12 am Post subject: |
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| Quote: | | I read the second one HAHAHAHAHAHA, I get it...he needed a lesson to get in a band, loser!!!! |
That cracked me up. |
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Gordy Smiff
Got Rhythm
Joined: 29 May 2006
Posts: 94
Location: Sutherland, actually.
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| Posted: Sun Jul 16, 2006 2:23 pm Post subject: |
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Q: How do you know when a singer knocks on the studio door?
A: He does'nt know when to come in.
Q: How do you know when a drummer knocks on the studio door?
A: The knocking speeds up.
Q: How do you know when the drum riser is level?
A: The drool comes out of BOTH sides of his mouth.
Q: How do you get a lead guitarist to stop playing?
A: Put some sheet music in front of him. |
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1bassleft
Lowdown Cack-hander
Joined: 16 Feb 2005
Posts: 3674
Location: "Hit The North"
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| Posted: Fri Jul 21, 2006 12:38 am Post subject: |
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, Gordy - some good'uns there. The thing about the vocalist; they don't know when to come in, and they never have the right key  |
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andy2001
Joined: 08 Feb 2008
Posts: 5
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| Posted: Fri Feb 08, 2008 5:59 pm Post subject: |
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Q: What did the drummer get on his SATs?
A: Drool
Q:What's the difference between a musician and a large pizza?
A: A large pizza can feed a family of four |
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