Chicks, Guitars and Respect | Advice wanted

Michael

I had an email from a guitarist who is seeking some advice. She says that no matter how hard she tries and the more she learns, male guitarists just don't take her seriously. She says it always a case of blokes noticing only her flaws and then patting each other on the back for far worse performances.

Musician issue or a every-day issue chicks face in a lot of areas - maybe a combination?

Any advice she will I'm sure she will appreciate, spesh from other female players.

bobhoulston · Last edited by bobhoulston on Thu Feb 10, 2011 6:06 pm; edited 1 time in total

Michael wrote:

She says that no matter how hard she tries and the more she learns, male guitarists just don't take her seriously.

Maybe she needs to realise that she doesn't require the approval of male musicians to succeed. Many of the young ladies I teach guitar to are streets ahead of their male conterparts as musicians. They usually sing better too.
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Rocklogicxxxxx · Groupie Joined: 14 Jun 2005 Posts: 43

Michael wrote:

I had an email from a guitarist who is seeking some advice. She says that no matter how hard she tries and the more she learns, male guitarists just don't take her seriously. She says it always a case of blokes noticing only her flaws and then patting each other on the back for far worse performances.

Musician issue or a every-day issue chicks face in a lot of areas - maybe a combination?

Any advice she will I'm sure she will appreciate, spesh from other female players.

Inherent in this complaint is the need to seek approval. Tell your friend to generate her own sense of worth as a musician and as a person and to avoid the pitfalls of the "Men are Bastards and here's the evidence" routine as although this may feel nice for a bit, it is ultimately destructive and is a victim's stance.

This is an every day issue for the vast majority of people although it is often cleverly hidden with a false "identity". Your friend is not alone!!

"Noticing flaws".. it's just feedback (no not that type of feedback!!). Shift the interpretation and it's a gift!!

bobhoulston · Posted: Thu Mar 16, 2006 8:07 pm Post subject:

"Everyone needs a wife, nobody needs a husband." - Germaine Greer
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1bassleft · Posted: Sun Mar 19, 2006 1:53 am Post subject:

Here's my tuppence. As a bassplayer, the arrival of the two Kims (Pixies and Sonic Youth) pretty much made female bassists de riguer, to the point I wondered if I'd ever get picked to play. I don't know whether this is because of the instrument (bass) or the genre (indie) but I can think of Tanya Donnelly (Throwing Muses, Belly) playing guitar and Vanessa auf der Mar (Hole) switching from bass to guitar for her solo album (as Kim Deal did for The Breeders).

It's probably a genre thing. I was on another forum and happened to post up that we'd switched from a female singer to a male and it suited our music better. A heap of neo-offensive "I would never have chicks in my band" replies followed, mostly from blues-rock types.

If it makes your emailer feel better, Mike, it may be nothing to do with todger-lacking. I've got 1st hand exp of types who backslap each other for "really nailing that Page/Beck/Santana/Young" whatever riff, but couldn't write a song if the pen were pushed through their scrote and about to self-destruct in 24hrs. I don't give a buttock for their opinions of me, and neither should she.

601blues · Posted: Mon Mar 20, 2006 4:39 pm Post subject:

But its not just Girls Dat get da treatment!! I advoid jam sessions Like da plegue, because its not a jam at all it turns into a competetion

glw · Posted: Mon Mar 20, 2006 4:51 pm Post subject:

I've heard stories of female guitarists not being taken seriously in music shops when looking for a guitar to buy.

But then, hey, we've all encountered jerks working in music shops.

Michael · Posted: Mon Mar 20, 2006 11:16 pm Post subject:

Cheers guys,

I'll pass it on.

1bassleft · Posted: Thu Mar 23, 2006 1:07 am Post subject:

And we really ought to start the "jerks working in music shops/ hanging around 'open mike' sessions" thread. Endless fun with those stories... Laughing

USGold · Got Rhythm Joined: 28 Mar 2006 Posts: 92

She must know a bunch of dumb/asses--a player is a player--close your eyes and you'll know it's all in the music. I was in a huge guitar shop a while back and this young woman was ripping it up ona a new american tele she was considering buying-I told her how well I thought she played ( much beyond My skill level)--if the blokes she knows can't be honest and critique the musician not the sex she needs to hang with a different crowd.

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