This is from my "Life with a band" memoirs I wrote so I would not forget my days playing in various bands. The time frame is 1974, and this is just one small sgement of life on the road with a small time band. Hope you find some humor in it!

My best friend Mark was a drummer who I had played with for a long time. In 1974, he got an offer from a band in Kentucky and jumped at the chance to go. The band had big bucks backing it up and he would have been a fool to turn it down over a friendship. About a month later they needed another guitar player and I was asked to audition. The manager of the band drove to Ohio and picked me up. As we were crossing into Kentucky, the manager says I better be good as he was NOT planning on driving me home. I got to the audition and found out I was to be auditioning for the back-up guitar slot. The audition started and I start going through my "routine", tossing my guitar around and generally being a big show-off.

Not only did I pass the audition; I was also awarded the lead slot, not to the liking of the (now former) lead guitarist. I was also awarded a Marshall stack and another strat to use as long as I stayed with the band. I should have known it was to good to be true as this tenure lasted less than a month due to several things. One being the fact that I was living with one of the roadies, who had failed to inform his family that I was going to be living with them. After the father and mother saw my large Afro, I overheard them screaming at their son they did not want me living there.

My first day in KY was a memorable one. Mark called from where he was staying (about 10 blocks away) and told me where to meet him. Neither of us had a car or a day job like the other guys, so we did a lot of walking. I got about a block away from where I was staying when I get stopped by a policeman who wants to see my identification. No problem. I was not going to argue with the guy because he had a gun and I had an ounce of a controlled substance in my pocket. He asked where I live and I really did not know. I just pointed to the house where I was staying and said I was living with a guy named "Bob". I did not even know his last name! The nice officer is not sure of my story and I could not blame him for that. He checks me for warrants and we are chatting and getting along swell.

Then Mark shows up. He starts in on the cop about harassment. I knew it was harassment, but with my pocket bulging with weed, I did not really care as long as the cop kept his hands to himself. I am trying to shut Mark up and the cop asks for his ID. I finally get Mark to realize that I am holding something I am not supposed to have and he shuts up real quick. No outstanding warrants on us so we are free to go. The policeman said if I was going to be around town for a while, I should probably get used to getting stopped. He was not kidding either. I got stopped 4 times in less than a month just walking down the street.

My next adventure was a special Kodak moment. Seems the band already had attracted a few groupies of its own and they were a slimy bunch of lumps. They took me over to some slug's house and her name was Michele. Upon entering the house I was greeted with a most unusual sight. Bob, the guy I was living with, was dragging a fat red harried girl across the floor by her hair. He introduces us;

"Mike this is Vickie, but just call her Sticky." How nice. She manages a "Hi. Nice to meet you ." as Bob drags her across the floor to a bedroom and slams the door shut and all hell breaks out behind the closed door. Interesting. Turns out she liked getting slapped around. Michele walks up to me and takes me by the hand and walks me out the back door to her garden. She says I can pick any plant I want. The plants were NOT tomatoes either! Pot plants, some as high as 8 feet filled her whole back yard!

The guys had been promising to hook me up with a babe named Joyce and I could not wait to see her! We drive over to this very exclusive neighborhood and walk up to the door of this huge house. When the door opens I almost throw up. Some old bag answers the door and flashes a toothless smile (well OK she had 3 teeth)and tries to kiss me! "Mike meet Joyce!" I scream in terror and lock myself in the car. Turns out not only is this Joyce, but it is also Sticky's mom.

One Friday night, we all piled into a car and drove over to Joyce's house. As we drove down the street and I noticed that ALL the neighbors are outside in their front lawns milling around. About 10 minutes after we get to Joyce's house, 4 large black limousines drive slowly down the street and pull into a large mansion across the street. There is an eight-foot high wall that goes around the house so we hustle up on top of Joyce's house to see what's going on. Each car had two people dressed in long black hooded robes. They got out of the cars and walked into the house! Turns out this was a monthly event that took place in relation to a full moon! One can only imagine what went on in that house!

Well things actually got nothing but worse from then on! Turns out that Joyce was a drug addict and was selling drugs to the other band members who were shooting up drugs with needles! When Mark and I saw this we quickly decided that we needed to get out of there. We called home and got money sent to us and we flew to Florida where I stayed for about 8 months. We were unable to get a proper band started there and I moved back home. 1974 was not a good year for me.

Other articles by Mike:

STUART SMITH INTERVIEW
http://www.guitarsite.com/newsletters/990927/9.shtml

JIM EARP
San Diego fingerstyle guitarist
http://www.guitarsite.com/newsletters/990913/28.shtml

PHIL KEAGGY
He has over 30 releases, played on hundreds of sessions and is highly regarded not only as a top notch musician and humble guy, but also as a respected man of God. Who is this guy? Phil Keaggy.
http://www.guitarsite.com/PhilKeaggy.htm